While I’m not exactly counting down the minutes (though my title might suggest otherwise), I’m kind of anxious about leaving for Cornell. I’m not really nervous or excited (yet), just incredibly restless. I have this incorrigible feeling that time isn’t moving even though I can clearly see the numbers on my digital clock flash by. College still feels like something incredibly nebulous even though it’ll be a solid reality in a few hours.
It’s hard for me to imagine what things are going to be like there when all I’ve known is my life in the city. Don’t get me wrong; I’m definitely not disappointed that I’m moving out and leaving for a while. I need a change, a big change.. but even though it’s what I want, I still feel strange about it.
There are so many things that I’m not going to be sorry to say goodbye to - people I won’t miss, old/useless drama, a lot of history, and (surprise!) a guy who’s put me through a lot of shit - but there are so many more that I’m going to miss. I love wandering around SoHo, the Brick Prison, shopping in Herald Square, clubs in Meatpacking, movies in Douglaston, sleepovers with people I’ve known for six years (yeaaah check out my faulty parallelism).. essentially almost everything the New York City has to offer that I can do with my friends.
So.
Conjunction junction, what’s your function?
I’m not really sure how I feel but I guess I’ve got a happy sort of anticipation mixed with a nostalgic sadness for high school/my childhood.
I started this post two hours ago. I suppose holding really isn’t accurate.
I just realized that it’s been a while since I’ve actually written anything. I’ve taken to posting pictures of my outfits lately and I suppose I was trying to convince myself that I was making good on my promise to blog at least somewhat routinely by simply doing that. Truthfully, though, I knew I wasn’t; I was taking the easy way out by putting up pictures rather than thinking. Hopefully, this is the end of that. For those of you who are here for the pictures: this doesn’t mean I’m not going to continue to share what’s in my closet so don’t worry. I’m just going to try to also include the occasional text post between pictures. :)
I haven’t been not writing because I’ve run out of things to say. It’s actually the opposite; there are a lot of things I wish I’d written about. I just can’t properly express what I’m thinking. Actually, it’s not even that. I’ve become so complacent and lazy (aagh!) that I don’t even want to make the effort to coherently recount my last few days of summer.
Which reminds me: T-18 days until I’m off to Ithaca for university.
But that’s still sort of far off so I don’t want to think about it too much yet.
Rewind to today: I got my lobes repierced again (my seconds and thirds on both sides.) I think this is the last time I’m going to get them done over because a) I’m tired of taking care of fresh piercings, b) I’ve now been pierced over twenty times (twenty-one ear piercings and one navel piercing, to be exact, though I kept less than half of them), and c) piercings are expensive! I don’t see myself needing to repierce them anymore anyway because I’m perfectly happy with the way they’re aligned now. I’m horribly nitpicky (which is why I’ve been pierced so many times with so little to show for it) so that’s really saying something.
Anyway, five piercings in a day (my piercer put my second piercing on my left ear a bit higher than I wanted it - the dot looked fine at first but when she actually pierced it, neither of us were very happy with the placement) is quite enough to stave me off my piercing addiction for a while. My ears a sore and I’m exhausted from work so I’m heading to bed. I have a bunch of things to finish up before I end my internship so these next two weeks look like they’re going to be pretty hectic.
If I could, I’d like to just sleep in and skip. If oooonlllyyy.
